I was never one to be into the whole “new year’s resolution” thing. My current job endeavor has me as a clerk in a gas station, so the topic has started to come up. I never really have one. My life is not that good that there is one thing I need to try to change in the year. Shit, that list could be longer than ol’ Saint Nick himself. This year though, things are kind of different. I actually accomplished a few things I said I would by the time I was 35, things I felt were holding me back from writing and just focusing of life period.
I acquired my GED, I got a semester finished of college. We moved across the country. I am now in a place where I should be at peace. A place, I thought I needed to be in to write. While I am thinking about it. I am surprised I actually did some of the things I said I would, granted they were easy. Not so much moving across the country. I really did not see how we would do this, but we did. Getting my GED and getting into college was nothing. It was a long process to get into school. I wanted to give up before I even started, and many times after I did. But I kept going.
So this year I will write. I will finish one whole story. Complete it. Get it all out of my head, start to finish. There are so many in there swirling around. I think about them before I fall asleep and sometimes before I even open my eyes. I need to take the time and get them out.
I’m going to take more time to learn how to write screenplays. I looked at some treatments the other day and boy do I have some work to do.
Want to hear something funny? When I go to the movies it’s an emotional experience for me. I literally become overwhelmed with feelings I cannot explain. I get a not in my throat and I feel the tears welling up in my eyes. All I can think about it what it feels like to be sitting in a theater as the writer, the producer or actor who made that film. How proud they must have felt to finish it. I think about how stupid I am for not having finished anything yet. For letting the years pass by. and all of the time I am wasting just dreaming and not doing. Then I get drunk, because the theatre I live by, serves drinks to my seat. They also serve a drink I am obsessed with! This particular one that Is vodka with strawberry puree topped with champagne. After a few of them I can forget my troubles and most of the movie and get through the experience. I don’t want to feel like that anymore.
So this year my resolution/goal is to just write. Write…Write…Write!